66. Redefining Self-Worth: Embracing Inner Strength and Manifesting Happiness with Keondra

Have you ever found yourself questioning your identity after losing everything? Our latest episode of "It's the Human Experience Podcast" features Keondra, a holistic well-being coach whose life was turned upside down during the COVID pandemic. Stripped of her job, apartment, relationship, and car, Keandra was compelled to look inwards and redefine her self-worth beyond material possessions. Through her journey of self-discovery and spirituality, she embraced the powerful concept of "I am," finding her authentic voice and recognizing her innate divinity and energy. Her compelling story will inspire you to see beyond external losses and connect with your true self.

We also dive into the transformative power of manifesting happiness. Discover how a daily commitment to positivity and intention-setting can help you create the life you desire, even when faced with significant obstacles. Sharing a personal narrative about manifesting a car, we highlight how the essence of manifestation goes beyond material gains—it's about reclaiming joy and purpose. Through determination and the right mindset, you can overcome feelings of defeat and truly believe in your deservingness of happiness. This episode underscores the importance of believing in yourself and continuously working towards your goals, showing that fulfillment and joy are within your reach.

Chapters

• 0:00 Self-Worth and Authenticity
• 15:43 The Power of Manifesting Happiness

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to. It's the Human Experience Podcast Hosted by Hazel Brown, a healthcare leader, wife, mom and career coach. If you're big on authenticity, personal development, perseverance and transparency, you're in the right place. Get ready to be uplifted, inspired and empowered as you become fearless in pursuit of the life you desire and deserve. Our goal is to help you level up by creating a safe space to learn and reflect, while listening to transparent stories from our host or successful professionals and business owners who've agreed to share the parts of success that typically gets X'd out on social media, because that's the part you need to see and hear the process. Go ahead and subscribe. You don't want to miss out on these transparent stories and discussions that reveal highs, lows, aha moments and nuggets that'll help you to grow and glow.

Speaker 2: 1:13

Hey, hey, hey. You are now tuned into the. It's the Human Experience podcast. I'm your host, hazel Brown. I am here today with Keandra. We are talking all the things self-worth, really getting into the heart of who you are, making sure that you uncover the layers to grow into your highest self. Welcome to the podcast, keandra.

Speaker 3: 1:32

Hello, thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here.

Speaker 2: 1:37

I'm so excited to have you. Let's jump right in and tell the folks who is Keandra.

Speaker 3: 1:42

Okay, so Keandra is, I am, I'm a lot. I am a lot. First and foremost, I am a mommy. I think that's one of the biggest things about me. I'm a mommy. I am a creator. I present myself to the world as a holistic well-being coach, and really what that is for me is my goal is to reconnect us back to our authentic selves. I go out into the community and into my workplace. That's where really this transformation started and I kind of found out a lot about who I am in the workplace and just again, reconnecting people back to who they authentically are and tapping into their innate divinity, that's what I do. But who I am is just a spiritual being. I'm energy. I am energy.

Speaker 2: 2:41

Nice, I love it. Yeah, absolutely Nice, I love it. Yeah, absolutely. Recognizing that you're a mom is definitely something that shows, because it shapes you. I think it really changes the way that you look at the world, based on your experience with parenting, and so I love that you call that out and that I love the talks about authenticity, getting back to who we are as people, about authenticity getting back to who we are as people, and I really would love to hear more about, like, your journey into finding yourself, because I'm sure that will help others listening really being able to find their selves.

Speaker 3: 3:15

Yes, absolutely. So my journey, as I stated again, a really big part of my transformation actually happened in the workplace For me. I found out a lot of who I was during the COVID period. It was a really transformational time period for me, as I had just gone through not only a loss of a job. I really lost everything during that time period in COVID, to the point where I had lost so many things that I had begun to feel like I lost myself and I didn't know who I was anymore. And you know, during COVID, with us being stuck in the house, really all I had to do was sit there and figure out okay, well, girl, who are you? Because you don't got nothing to do, so we might as well figure it out. We don't have anywhere to go, so let's figure out who we are. And this conversation kind of happened internally for me, again in the workplace.

Speaker 3: 4:20

I work in financial industry and I deal with clients who are facing hardship. But during that time again, I had so many losses that I was facing my own hardship and I was really able to relate to my clients in a way that I did not ever fathom that I would be able to do, and it caused me to question myself Again. I had lost at that point a previous job before I started the new career that I was in. I had lost an apartment, I had lost a relationship, I had lost my car. So again, there was a lot of just ills that I felt like I was taking back to back and ultimately just being stuck in the house. I think that I had gone through this period where it was like, well, I don't have anything else to lose, what can I gain now? What can I learn about me? And I dug into spirituality at that time. It wasn't necessarily intentional, but it was something that kind of just like fell in my lap. I think that at that time I was dabbling, the spirit was like nah, come over here, come over here. I need for you to listen and to look at yourself and to see who it is that you are.

Speaker 3: 5:46

For me, with all of those losses that I had taken and facing them in my clients as well, I think what it turned into for me was just finding new ways to express myself authentically, finding what my voice sounds like. I realized through all of those losses, those things never even made me who I am. The things that I lost. They never even defined me in the first place, but without having anything there, it was like okay, so how do I rebuild If these things weren't me in the first place? Who does that mean that I am?

Speaker 3: 6:29

And so I started doing that work of trying to figure out who I am and that, in itself, that phrase I am to me, that became a really powerful phrase. I learned what the meaning of I am is and the creative power of just even saying I am. I learned a lot about you know what that power represents during that really dark time period for me, and I started to change the way that I spoke about who I am. I stopped actually saying that I am this sad person, I'm this person who has lost everything, I'm this person who has nothing, who can't do anything, and I started to say, okay, well, I'm here, so there is something that I'm obviously meant to do because I am still here. So what is that? And questioning that ended up turning into okay, well, I am a creator. I created, you know, all of these things around me. I created my surroundings, I created the hardship that I was facing. So what else is it that I can create in my life and, um, I was able to implement that in my work.

Speaker 3: 7:44

I worked in a call center where I'm dealing with a whole bunch of different energies and I was able to see how the energy that I started to carry it started to reflect back to me in the different connections that I was making, reflect back to me in the different connections that I was making.

Speaker 3: 8:08

And that was really exciting for me to see how the days where I'm sad and I am beating up on myself I am feeling like, oh my God, I can't do anything right, how that would reflect back to me.

Speaker 3: 8:16

And the days where, when I started to do the work and I started to say you know, I'm more than the circumstances that I'm facing, how that would reflect back to me and my reality and that made me more intentional about what I'm saying and what I'm doing. And as I saw that being intentional about what I'm saying and what I'm doing, it started changing my experiences. It really had a complete 180 on my life experiences. It really had a complete 180 on my life. It really changed all those losses into wins that I didn't foresee coming. It just kind of naturally aligned with who I was now saying that I am and that was amazing for me and something that I ended up wanting to share with others, because it was such a powerful change, it was such a day and night change. It was like I can't keep this to myself. Y'all got to know this too. Y'all got to know this too. Thank you.

Speaker 2: 9:16

I think the fact that you speak to decision-making right that everything that we do in our life is a decision.

Speaker 2: 9:24

It's our choice of making a decision to move the needle forward in a positive way or to stay stuck in our current circumstance or to dwindle in the past and what was wrong and what didn't work out.

Speaker 2: 9:37

And I love that you brought that up because many times people feel as though they don't have the ability to change the trajectory of their lives, but the reality is you can't, especially if you're a woman listening, you can't be a woman and have the ability to create life literally, but not that you can create and shape your own life. Love that you brought that up because it is so important that, as beings, we realize that if we choose to look at what we're capable of doing, analyze who we are as people and I love that you talked even about COVID and how that was able to help. You see, like, wait, I'm stuck in here with me, let me be where I am Because so many people through COVID, there was actually an increase in divorce, increase in suicide, increase in financial difficulties. So I love that you took that experience to actually increase your knowledge and in who you are as a person and decide to get closer to self and growing into your authentic self. So kudos to you for that.

Speaker 3: 10:43

Thank you. Yeah, it was it. I got to thank me for that too, because where I was definitely like you said, that trajectory, you really do have the power to change and it really is as simple as you said a decision, now, a repetitive decision. It's not a one and done kind of decision, but it is a decision that you can make at any given time because we are all, we all are creators. You know now, as women, we do have, you know, that power to create on a more drastic level, but we all are creators at the end of the day, and it's about what we want to create. And are you going to make the decision to create something different? Are you going to let your life create for you? And just, you know, by default, create, have circumstances created? So, absolutely, I certainly agree, it is a decision.

Speaker 2: 11:37

Definitely a big proponent of like I'm not going to let my finances drive me, my career drive me. I'm going to drive my life and, to some points that you talked about earlier, the importance of spirituality when you come to making decisions about how you move. I know for me, what really helped to shape how I move forward in life had a lot to do with realizing that I'm not in control of my life and looking at the signs and the way things shows up and understanding how I feel and having a pulse check in what doesn't feel right to me, whether it's a person, it's a career, it's a business partner, it is a relationship, it is a city that you're in, it is the places that you go. Whatever the case may be like, you are always reacting to the circumstances that you're faced with and you have to have a pulse check on that to know, hey, this does not feel right, this place doesn't feel right, this career doesn't feel right, the timing doesn't feel right, and you have to see how that shows up in your nervous system and be very intentional to the point of writing things down.

Speaker 2: 12:43

I like to talk through even the point of things just going in cycles and learn from them. They they naturally repeat themselves until we're able to learn. And then, even when we learn from them, it's just like the seasons of the world to where we're going to go through things over and over again, and so it's important to be mindful of our experience. In that experience, we're able to better understand how to gauge it the next time we face it. And so it's really important that you talked on what you just discussed, because when you think about self actualization and really moving into who you are as a person and living a life that's aligned to you, you have to be still enough to do those things.

Speaker 3: 13:25

Yeah, absolutely Absolutely.

Speaker 3: 13:28

One thing that you said that kind of stands out to me, I think even with, like, learning those lessons and those cycles and being still right At a certain level, you stop reacting to those situations and you start responding because you have that awareness around things.

Speaker 3: 13:45

Start responding because you have that awareness around things and I think there's a really big difference to reacting and responding. That reacting it can kind of be, you know, like almost automatic, without that intention behind it, so you kind of do things out of habit, whereas when we start responding, when we take that moment to slow down, like you said, and be still, you can then decide okay, is this aligned with where I want to go? Is this aligned with the journey that I'm trying to create, the life that you know I feel like I'm destined for, that is written out for me, that I'm trying to create? Am I responding in a way that gets me closer there? Or are my reactions keeping me in this cycle where it is repeating, until we make that conscious decision to respond differently to the situation? So I think that's a really huge part of breaking those cycles and just moving that needle forward so that you can see some growth in your life, some change in your life.

Speaker 2: 14:50

Absolutely, and before we even get into the hearts of the things, I feel like it's just so important to talk through something that you mentioned early on about all of the L's that you took right and all of the L's that you took. In a typical fixed mindset, someone would think this is my current circumstance and I don't think I'm going to be able to get out of it. Because how if I don't have a car? How if I don't have a job? How if this is happening?

Speaker 2: 15:14

And I think that it's very important one to know yourself worth and to know that, just like you're able to go down, you're able to go up. Yes, able to hold on to faith and the belief in yourself, to know that you're deserving of going up. It's just so that you can learn from an experience to better understand yourself as you move up. And so I think it's important that we go into the mindset that you have to have to come back up from whatever down you're on. And I think to your point of something you said earlier where it's a constant commitment. I don't think we talk about that enough.

Speaker 2: 15:50

It is an everyday decision for you to be able to move the needle forward in living the life that you want to live. An everyday decision as simple, and I'll share an example for myself. Recently, as I am planning different things, things, I had to ask myself one morning why did you sign up for this life? I didn't go to sleep. Yeah, get up, don't. Nobody want to do. This is what you signed up for, this is what we're doing, and so I shared that.

Speaker 2: 16:21

To say that outside, looking in, it looks like everybody that you see that's doing this and doing that is just like, oh, everything is perfect, everything is exciting, but it's a constant commitment to know that they're deserving of it. Is a constant decision and a choice that you make every day to decide to take the high road and be full of gratitude and knowing that you are so much further along than where you started. And then you have so far to go if you keep on putting in the reps and taking the steps forward to be able to live the life you're deserving of living. So I really want to hear a little bit about how you were able to shift your mind in those moments of feeling like you were taking L's. How do you go from that mindset to getting the grit to be able to overcome it and move it to where you are today?

Speaker 3: 17:15

Yeah, absolutely. It's actually really funny how that happened for me. Like I said, I spirituality kind of fell on to me, I think. For me, how is that? Again, I lost. I lost a lot.

Speaker 3: 17:32

The first thing that I felt like I needed and you kind of pointed it out like I don't have a car, right, how am I supposed to, how am I supposed to live my life, do the things that I need to do? I can't get anywhere. And during that time, during COVID, one of the popular things that had took off during that time I don't know if it's still popular now, but at that time this app, clubhouse had got really popular, you familiar. I had got on Clubhouse and there was this woman who was actually teaching manifestation, the art of manifestation, right. And so the first thing that I had decided okay, well, if you're going to teach me manifestation, I need a car, so let's figure this out right. So she was teaching manifestation and what she taught it actually worked.

Speaker 3: 18:25

I was able to go ahead and get that card, but me feeling again like I lost everything. I'm not a person where you know physical things. Material doesn't mean a lot to me. Again, the card was just because I got stuff to do. But what I realized was, if I can manifest a car, why can't I manifest happiness back into my life? Because that was lost for me and I used to be this really joyous, cheerful person before COVID, before I took all of these L's and I missed that side of me. I missed the side of me that was always smiling and that always had something cheerful to say and who was out in the world. I missed that.

Speaker 3: 19:10

So after I was able to see I could manifest a whole car, I could manifest happiness. That actually became my goal. My goal became to manifest myself back, to manifest Keandra Again. Who is Keandra? I wanted to find out who that person was, and I think that was the driving force, that commitment that I kept going back to when things got hard is that I don't want to be what people expect me to be. I don't want to be who the world says that I have to be. I want to be what feels right. I want to. I want to be what brings me joy, what brings me happiness.

Speaker 3: 19:55

So that was, that was the start for me, and what? What? I think the bigger thing for me was, as I can actually I even continue to take L-Stream after I started manifesting my car. But that thing that was in the back of my head is I can make things happen. I just saw how I was able to make this car happen. So what else can I make happen? And I'm not willing to give up on me. I got to live the rest of my life with me. I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to be here as long as I am here. So, because I got to stick with me, I'm about to be happy again.

Speaker 3: 20:37

And that was my thought when I was taking L's, when I had conversations with people that felt like I'm not getting anywhere with you, anytime, that there was something that felt like a roadblock in my journey. The thought in the back of my head is you deserve to feel happiness. I know that this is something that just exists in itself and you deserve to feel it. So let's keep working until we manifest that back into our lives.

Speaker 3: 21:05

And I think for me, after you start proving to yourself what's possible, at a certain point, there's no looking back. I've already seen how it works. I've seen what the power of my intention is, so I'm not willing to let go of that for something that's presenting itself as an obstacle. I know that there's a way to overcome this. I know that there's tools and resources that are available for me to feel a better way, and I started living for that feeling. I started living for the happiness and joy of it. So I think that's what. It sounds so simple, but that's really what it was. It was just doing it, for I want a better feeling. What's the?

Speaker 2: 21:51

feeling. I think it really goes back into the decision that we make right. And I think when sometimes people share terms like manifestation, it seems so witchcrafty. They think that woo-woo stuff and they think to themselves what are these people doing? But to your point, it's truly making sure that you know that you're deserving of it and you think about what you can do to work for that life.

Speaker 2: 22:20

I always say the plan only works if you work it, and many times people don't work the plan and I think what happens is that when we're thinking about the fact that we are doing the quote unquote right thing, we think everything is supposed to work out perfectly for us because we are good people doing the right thing. We have a good heart. None of that matters. It matters that you're being yourself. If you want to be a good person, you want to do the right thing. We have a good heart. None of that matters Like. It matters that you're being yourself. If you want to be a good person, you want to do the right thing, if you want to have a good heart, but you're doing that for you. You're not for the universe. You're doing it for you.

Speaker 2: 22:55

And so I think what we have to come away from is thinking that simply because we're a good person and all the things that life is not going to life, life is still going to life. And what I always tell myself, like when life, life's a lot while you're trying to level up, I always ask myself cause I bring it back to God, and I asked myself, if he can't trust you with this, why should he trust you with the next thing? If you are going to fold, because it's hard now, who are you to think you're deserving of the next level? And it's a constant reminder that if we want what we say we're deserving of, it's going to come with tests, because the people that you're going to make breakthroughs in their lives for they're coming with problems and tests. And if you can't get through a test, who are you to help them get through anything? And so it's a constant reminder that we have to be the example in the work that we're doing, and that means we go through some stuff to get there, but that also shows us our strength and the next time we encounter something else, we're able to know we're deserving of it.

Speaker 2: 24:01

And to your point of manifestation, like for me, I always try to go through the depths of things, because for me, if I say that I want, I'm trying to think of what I want. Let's go back to a car. I'm so tired of the car now, let's get a different car, get a different car. Then I'm thinking about okay, this is the car that I want, how much does that car cost?

Speaker 2: 24:30

How much do I need to make to be able to afford that car? Do I need to start going to the dealer so I can make sure I understand the qualifications for that car? If I have the qualifications and I get it. If I don't, I understand what I need to work through to be able to make it happen. And if I said I wanted that, I never stopped doing the things that I need to do to make that a reality for me and I will get the car because I never gave up on working on planning to get it Exactly, exactly.

Speaker 3: 24:58

That's exactly what it is.

Speaker 2: 25:00

Yeah, and I think sometimes sorry, I just want to say sometimes we're in our head that because we're good people and we have a good heart and we're trying our best and it's not working out, we think it's not meant for us.

Speaker 2: 25:14

You just got more work to do. You're just not willing to roll up your sleeves as far as you need to, you're not willing to lose a little bit of sleep, you're not willing to put what you need to put in to understand that you can get whatever it is you want out of life if you're willing to work for it, if you're willing to get around positive people, that will encourage you to keep going, even when it's hard. But if you're going through things and you're going after things and you're around people that don't want more out of life, they are settling for whatever life is throwing at them. It is going to be that much harder to accomplish your goal, not because you can't do it, but because of the proximity and power of what the people you have around you. So there's like so many layers that go into it and, to your point, we make it sound like it's so simple, but it's hard work it is hard work.

Speaker 3: 26:05

Yes, yes, I think there's this analogy that I really love and I use it whenever I am facing those challenges that we go through when we're trying to accomplish something, and it's the analogy of a rocket ship. Right, when a rocket ship is built, it's built with all these different pieces and components on it and it's put on this launch pad. And then, after it's on this launch pad after who knows how long it took to even build the rocket ship to get to that point it takes off and it has to break through the atmosphere. Breaking through the atmosphere is literally ripping it apart. Thinking of yourself as a rocket ship, imagine what that feels like to be able to break through these different barriers. Right, and as you're doing that, there's pieces of the rocket ship. Although they were on there, they were meant to fall off.

Speaker 3: 27:01

And sometimes, as a person, when pieces of us start to get ripped away as we're ascending, we get scared and we feel like, oh well, this isn't the direction that I should be going, because things are falling apart. It was supposed to. Or we think that, because we're ripping through this thing and it's hard to rip through these levels, that we're not supposed to go that way. But you're supposed to. It's supposed to happen that way. These different things are supposed to happen for you to get to your destination. You're going to go through these periods where things fall apart. You're going to go through these periods where it feels like you're trying to force your way through to the next level. You're going to go through these periods where it feels like you're floating in space and nothing is happening. All of these things happen before you get to your destination, but it doesn't mean that the rocket ship wasn't meant to get there. It's still supposed to be there. You just got to go through these different things. It's all a part of the process and it goes to like trusting the process.

Speaker 3: 28:01

Trust what you were here to do. If you have that desire, if you want to get there, you can. But are you willing to experience the different levels, the different things that it comes with? Are you going to turn away just because it gets hard, because it gets difficult? Are you going to keep going because you know where you're meant to be? That keeps me going when stuff gets hard, when I start losing things. Now it's like I know where I'm meant to be. I know where I'm going. I have the vision, I see where I'm supposed to go and I'm going to get there. So that changed the game for me.

Speaker 2: 28:38

So, luli, I'm so here for it. Listen, we want the listeners to get there too. Listen, it was such a great conversation. Where can the listeners find you?

Speaker 3: 28:48

I am currently on TikTok, most often as soulhealingkeys that's S-O-U-L. Healingkeys and on Instagram as keysgoddesshouse, so that's where you can find me.

Speaker 2: 29:04

Well, thank you so much, Keandra, for jumping on the podcast. This was such a great conversation. We have to bring it back so we can have some more conversations.

Speaker 3: 29:12

Absolutely. I would love to listen. It could get deep, okay.

Speaker 2: 29:22

We're here for it, right, and that's why I try to make sure we're having these kinds of conversations, so that people can really understand like they are not alone.

Speaker 2: 29:26

They can absolutely live the life that they are calling themselves for. They're being called to live is how I should frame it, and I want them to get there, so I love that. If you're not already following the podcast, make sure you scroll up to the top and hit that follow button. Make sure that you leave us a comment so we know your greatest takeaways and all the things. Go back and listen to other episodes so you can better understand who you are and you could grow and glow and we'll catch you on the next episode.

Speaker 1: 29:54

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