55. The Honest Truth About Pursing Our Goals and Overcoming Self-Doubt or Fear with Hazel Atkinson-Brown

Have you ever felt the thrill of embarking on a new goal, only to be met with an inner voice of doubt and a mountain of unforeseen challenges? Join me, Hazel Brown, as we unravel the raw and unfiltered truth behind the pursuit of our ambitions in the latest episode of "It's the Human Experience Podcast." Together, we'll navigate through the muddled waters of setting goals and tell the transparent tales that social media success stories often omit. I'll share the highs of realization and the lows of self-doubt that accompany the journey towards personal and professional growth, offering empathy and affirmation that your struggles are a shared human experience.

As we converse, I'll guide you through the labyrinth of emotions and learning curves that come with striving for success. We'll celebrate the moment when hard work begins to bear fruit and the recognition starts rolling in, as well as confront the new uncertainties that invariably arise from progress. There are no guests in this episode, just honest conversations that foster a safe space for learning and reflection. By the end of our time together, you'll have collected valuable nuggets of wisdom that will empower you to grow, glow, and become fearless in your quest for the life you've always envisaged. So, hit that subscribe button and let's embark on a journey that promises to uplift, inspire, and empower.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to. It's the Human Experience Podcast Hosted by Hazel Brown, a healthcare leader, wife, mom and career coach. If you're big on authenticity, personal development, perseverance and transparency, you're in the right place. Get ready to be uplifted, inspired and empowered as you become fearless in pursuit of the life you desire and deserve. Our goal is to help you level up by creating a safe space to learn and reflect, while listening to transparent stories from our host or successful professionals and business owners who've agreed to share the parts of success that typically gets X'd out on social media, because that's the part you need to see and hear the process. Go ahead and subscribe. You don't want to miss out on these transparent stories and discussions that reveal highs, lows, aha moments and nuggets that'll help you to grow and glow.

Speaker 2: 1:12

Hey, hey, hey. You are now tuned in to the it's the Human Experience podcast. I'm your host, hazel Brown. Welcome back. If you're a return listener, welcome. If it's your first time tuning into the podcast, welcome. Welcome.

Speaker 2: 1:32

Today I wanted to really talk through the process of standing up those goals, because recently I saw something that really spoke to how we want things to happen. Like we set a goal and we're just ready to achieve it because we put in the work, versus how they tend to happen. And you set it, you start it. Then, from setting it to starting it, there comes self-doubt. Then, when we overcome self-doubt, we still have to go through the learning phase. As we go through the learning phase, we experience things. We learn all sorts of new things about ourselves, about the process, about what we need to do differently, and then we start feeling as though we're failing again because there's still much more to learn and the reality is just, it's a part of the process. From there we have to start practicing, getting better, learning some more. And then we just feel like, oh my God, like I just thought I was going to the finish line, like why do I feel lost? Why is this fuzzy? I at least got to a point before where I felt like I could do it. How come it feels like I'm further away, even though I'm supposed to be closer to accomplishing my goals. Then you're like, okay, I'm getting it, it's going good. All that learning, all that practicing, all that putting in the work, even when I didn't want to. I see the fruits, I see the bloom, I see the flowers, I see it. Yes, people are starting to recognize it. This is what I've been working for. Yes, these are all the feelings. Right, these are all the feelings.

Speaker 2: 3:18

And then you get it, like you're starting to get it, and then new ideas come, new people come, new problems come, new things come, and then it feels like you're struggling again. And the reason I wanted to break it out like that to you because I want you to remember that there was a point before that you felt like you were failing. There's a point before where you felt like you were lost. There was a point before where you felt like you were struggling. There's a point before where you felt like you were lost. There was a point before where you felt like you were struggling. There's a point before where you were even doubting whether you can do it. But in those lows there were also the highs of you learning, of you practicing, of you starting, of you getting it.

Speaker 2: 3:59

And so know that you have to hold on to those highs so that, as we encounter our perceived perceptions around lows, we can actually accomplish our goals. We can actually achieve it because it is very normal to go through things, accomplish some things but still feel like, how can I do this next thing? Because I experienced it with everything that I do, and it's not imposter syndrome and it's really not limiting beliefs. I feel like we have all these different sayings out there that we can cling on to if we would like to, but the reality is this is just a normal process and progression of life.

Speaker 2: 4:42

When you're going after something new, it's unfamiliar territory, and if it's something that you're not familiar with, you're going to have to learn, you're going to have to practice. We think to ourselves and I don't know why skating comes to mind. Listen like why couldn't something else come to mind? But when I think about skating, I am not a pro skater, so it's unfamiliar territory. So if I'm going to try to learn, I'm going to fall. I'm going to have the fear of failing, fear of falling, fear of hurting myself, then the embarrassment that comes with it, like I just don't even want to deal with it. But the reality is, in order to be successful in learning how to skate, you got to go through the process, and just when you think you got it, you're going to fall again, Especially if you put those skates down because you decided it was too much. Now you got to start back over. Now you have to learn some more.

Speaker 2: 5:43

And even when you think you've learned so much and you've mastered it, there's always something new to learn. I think it's so important that we sit in that, because so many times we are not reminded until we're reminded of how things really feel. When you're trying to work on something new, it's not easy, and then, as we master our minds to get through things, sometimes you're navigating that space by yourself and even if you have a partnership or a collaboration or people that you love, sometimes you're not open to sharing exactly what it is that you're experiencing and whatever it is that you are feeling. But I want you to understand that if you know in your heart that whatever it is that you're trying to stand up, whatever it is you're working on, is something that you're truly passionate about. Know that these feelings are to be expected, but understand that there are things that you need to learn from in this process, in this moment. There's things you need to learn about yourself in order for you to level up appropriately in your next level and in your current level. So don't take it lightly.

Speaker 2: 6:58

My husband recently sent me something that talked about I forgot what law it was. It wasn't Murphy's law, it was one of these laws but it talked about the fact that it is important to not make a decision when you don't need to make a decision right. And I feel like so many times. We're in a world where we're constantly trying to make decisions and do new things and go after new goals when it's not time to decide yet, it's not time to move yet. It's still time to observe, it's still time to practice, it's still time to learn, it's still time to understand ourselves better, and I'm sharing this because, personally, I'm in a space where I know that it's not time to do something different, it is not time to add more, it is not time to fill my plate further just because I know how to process the items on my plate, just because I've done great things before.

Speaker 2: 7:57

Sometimes, even when you have the capacity to do more, it is so powerful to rest, it is so powerful to sit and be content where you are. And I don't know who this message is for, but I really think it's very valuable to share, because, for me, I feel like we're programmed to go after more, to do more, to feel like we're not doing enough. But I want to give you the peace of mind to recognize when it is enough, when you are doing enough and when it is okay to take a pause for a moment to enjoy what's in front of you. And I'm sure you've heard this before. But when you don't appreciate the things that are in front of you, it is often very true that you will not appreciate the new things that you're working towards, and so I just want you to spend some time really sitting in the life that you've already built for yourself, the work that you've already been able to stand up and do, and recognize what is next for you. What is it that you truly want to do? But make those decisions after rest. Don't make those decisions after feeling like you're already burnt out, feeling like you're already at your wit's end.

Speaker 2: 9:13

I don't know where you are in your process, but I can tell you there's been moments in my life where I have had enough. I have done enough, I am burnt out, but I'm ready to do more. And then there's other moments where it's time to do more. And then there's other moments where it's time to do more. And then I have other moments where, no, sweetheart, you're not doing enough and you know you're not doing enough. And so I share all those different frames, because it really depends on the lens that you're coming from, where you are in the process and what you need to do for yourself, but give yourself a peace of mind and knowing that you are the the process and what you need to do for yourself, but give yourself a peace of mind in knowing that you are the decision maker. It is your life to stand up your goals according to what makes the most sense for you, and until you reflect and look in the mirror, you won't know what makes sense for you. So that is the reason why I wanted to take the time to bring up the process.

Speaker 2: 10:04

Listen, nobody likes the process, aside from the fact that you actually learn so much about yourself. You're actually able to build so much grit, you're actually able to make it to where imposter syndrome and limiting beliefs are less likely, because you know you who you are. You know your strengths, you know your weaknesses, you know who you need to bring along with you for the ride. You know who you need to leave behind, because you know what kind of person you are. You know the hearts of who you are, and the more that you learn who you are is, the more you attract the kind of people that you want, the kind of people that you are deserving of. So do the work, go through the process, take a pause when you need to.

Speaker 2: 10:43

I am rooting for you. I want you to win. You want you to win the future. You wants you to win. Listen, a lot of people want you to win, clearly. So I want you to go ahead and bet on yourself, and I will see you in the next episode. If you have not already listened to previous episodes, go back, take a listen. I promise their value adds are all meant to build on helping you become the best version of yourself. So go ahead and do that, and know that you are destined for greatness and you deserve everything.

Speaker 1: 11:17

We hope you caught all those gems. So here for all of it. Be sure to subscribe so that you don't miss a gem. Write a review so that we know to keep bringing you episodes like this. And check us out online at itsthehumanexperiencecom to keep up with us. Keep growing and glowing. Catch you on the next episode.